Tuesday, October 11, 2005

The True Fictional Story of Noah

A completely, utterly fictional story of a man named Noah narrated in language that sounds just a mite bit better than a reverse Babelfish. Based on the completely, utterly true story of a man named Noah (Genesis 6-9).

In the beginning...
A long long time ago, out of nothing at all, God made the heavens and the earth, the land and the sea, the sun and the moon, the birds of the air, the creatures on the land and the fish of the sea. And he made man and woman. He loved them and instructed them on the best way to live in the wonderful creation he had made. He also warned them that attempting to usurp his rightful rule over the whole universe would lead to death, because by deciding that they didn't want the very Giver and Source of Life, they would get what they asked for: complete eternal death. And by rejecting the Creator of everything good, they would get what they specifically requested: to be cut off and utterly separated from anything good. Natural cause and effect.

Man and woman lived in the wonderful garden God had made for them and enjoyed the food God had provided for them. Still, they decided that God couldn't be trusted. So though they didn't create the world, nor could they figure out how it worked, nor did they even understand how they themselves worked or what was best for themselves, they decided they would do things their own way and view the world how they wanted to view it and ignore the kind instructions and the clear warnings of God. In fact, what use had they for God when they could determine for themselves how they world should work and what was best for themselves. And surely there was no such thing as death.

Silly extremely stupid man and woman.

So ignorant, weak and puny man and woman feeling very pleased with themselves, blew rude raspberries at God and called him a liar and a fool and strutted forth in smirky arrogance and attempted to sit on his throne and reject their Giver and Source of Life, the Creator of everything good. They so blinded their own eyes that they convinced themselves although he had made the whole universe, he was too weak to do anything to them. Perhaps…although they had seen him and talked with him…perhaps he didn't even exist. Not really real.

But God was real and his word was trustworthy and his warnings were true. Because he knew how he had made the universe to work, after all.

Death Penalty and One More Chance
And so man and woman would have reaped the natural consequences of rejecting their Giver and Source of Life and the Creator of everything good: eternal and horrific death, a cesspool of all the pain and suffering in the world imaginable, where there could be no love, no relationship, no mercy, no compassion (for those where all good things). But God in his great mercy spared them this undeliverable fate…for the moment. He gave them a limited number of years to live so that they might have the opportunity to repent of their doomed attempted usurpation and be saved from that undeliverable fate.

But as the years went on, and men and women filled the earth, they absolutely refused to make use of this grace period to repent for their horrendous rebellion. As they continued to live not quite in complete happiness, but not complete misery either, they got used to hurting and being hurt by others, forgetting that all this hurt was but a foretaste of the agony to come if they did not begin to live under God's rule again. In fact, as they continued to live year after year, they started to mistake God's grace period as evidence that God was too weak to act. Perhaps…perhaps he didn't even exist after all.

But God was real and his word was trustworthy and his warnings were true. Because he had created the entire universe and was the judge over everything, after all.

Death Penalty and A Second Chance
So the men and women would have reaped the natural and just consequences of rejecting the grace period that was held out for them and be left to their undeliverable fate. But God in his great mercy and infinite patience (1 Peter 3:20) again spared them this undeliverable fate…for the moment. Amongst all these wicked people, there was one man who acknowledged God as the Giver and Source of Life and the Creator of everything good and he trusted God. God told him that the undeliverable fate that had been hanging over the heads of all people was due to come soon in the form of a flood. By the flood, just destruction would come to all people who deserved it. As for Noah he would be saved by building himself an ark.

Although there was never such a thing as a flood in living memory, and Noah was hundreds of miles from any large body of water, Noah believed that God was trustworthy and that his warning was true and that his instructions for how he could be saved would be effective.

There was great jeering and sneering from everyone,"Fool! Day-dreamer! Madman! Where will the water spring from in this desert? Poor old Noah, are you going to drown in a puddle?" But Noah set about building a huge ark…in bone-dry land. Year in, year out, Noah continued to add plank after plank to the ark. Decades passed and people laughed even harder for after so many years, there was not even the slightest indication that a flood could be remotely possible.

"Repent!" cried Noah to them, "for destruction is near! Repent and turn back to God, for God is the Giver and Source of your life! You have already lost your life and anything you treasure as good! Quick, turn back to him and beg him for mercy before it is too late!"

The people scoffed at him,"Oooh look at Mister Chicken Little now." "The sky is falling! The sky is falling!", they laughed as they danced around him.

Alarmed at their flippancy at a time like this, Noah desperately urged repentance from the children, for perhaps the children would listen and be saved from this horrible end. But the people saw Noah talking to their children and beat him to the ground with sticks. They set their dogs to tear into his flesh and hurled him from their presence.

This is a civilised place they said. We are educated and we know what the world is about. We've tolerated your eccentric theories so far because they do no harm to us, but how dare you bully and corrupt our children with your madman beliefs and crazy ideas.

Death Penalty but No More Chance
And people continued to be born, get married, lived their lives in relative comfort and there was not even a hint that the God Noah spoke of existed (not to say that he would do anything about their alleged rebellion against him). But Noah, though faced with events that he had yet to see, continued to construct the ark in reverent fear of the Lord because he continued to trust that what God had said was true (Hebrews 11:7).

And so people were eating and drinking, marrying and being given in marriage until suddenly, the flood did come. And they were all swept away (Matthew 24:37). And the little children too.

Are people being persecuted for their Noahic warnings? They should take comfort.
Are people persecuting others for their Noahic warnings? They should take heed.
"For if God did not spare angels when they sinned, but cast them into hell and committed them to chains of gloomy darkness to be kept until the judgment; if he did not spare the ancient world, but preserved Noah, a herald of righteousness, with seven others, when he brought a flood upon the world of the ungodly; if by turning the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah to ashes he condemned them to extinction, making them an example of what is going to happen to the ungodly; and if he rescued righteous Lot, greatly distressed by the sensual conduct of the wicked (for as that righteous man lived among them day after day, he was tormenting his righteous soul over their lawless deeds that he saw and heard); then the Lord knows how to rescue the godly from trials, and to keep the unrighteous under punishment until the day of judgment, " (2 Peter 2:4-9)

Icons thanks to Bry-Back Manor.


At October 12, 2005 12:08 am , Anonymous wb said...

I think this is a good Christian reply to the recent hooha in the papers.


At October 13, 2005 11:23 am , Anonymous shadow said...

The folks in UK are grappling with a similar problem with the proposal to introduce religious hatred laws. The proposed amendments are vague and some fear this will curtail their freedom to preach the gospel.


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